Sunday, 11 November 2007

Vile Duets

My co worker and I try to break up the day by coming up with horrible songs. I pride myself on being able to come up with really pretty disgustingly, bad songs, but he somehow always can top me. His knowledge of bad songs from the 70's is outstanding. Having said that, I would have to say that I soundly defeated him at horrible Billy Joel songs. But he came back and took the Wilson Phillips contest. This ongoing amusement we have includes singing these horrible songs, looking up lyrics and sometimes youtubing them. It is always accompanied with groans of disgust and laughter. These songs then become brain worms that stay in your head all day like some sort of time share tumour. I have to say it really does make the day go by faster, even if it sounds like something you would see on The Office.

Here is our list of Vile Duets. Be prepared to get sick.
In no particular order of Vileness:

1. Crusin', Huey Lewis and Gwenyth Paltrow. I can't stand him, but she really ruins the song. I feel nauseous just remembering in my head.

2. Endless Love, Diana Ross and Lionel Ritchie. He is responsible for a lot of horrible songs. And Madame Ross has a few other horrible duets under her belt. Remember that terrible one, All of You, with Julio Iglesias?

3. Tell Him, Celine Dion and Barbra Streisand. That one just makes me shudder. It is enough to put me in the hospital.

4. Should Have Never Let You Go. Neil Sedaka and Dara Sedaka. As if the song weren't bad enough on its own, this is a father and daughter duet! It is so gross that they are singing a romantic love song together. It is vile and just plain wrong!

5. I Finally Found Someone, Bryan Adams and Barbra Streisand. Babs makes several well earned appearances on the list.

6. After All, Cher and Peter Cetera. Who thought up this pairing? They must have been high.

7. Almost Paradise, Nancy Wilson and Mike Reno. This is an all Canadian barf fest.

8. The Girl is Mine & Say Say Say, Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney. You can't mention the one retched song without mentioning the other.

9. Ebony and Ivory, Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney. This song is supposed to promote harmony , but it just makes me want to hurt both of them.

10. Can't We Try, Dan Hill and Vonda Sheppard. Thank God Ally McBeal isn't on anymore.

11. When You Believe, Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey. Yuck, yuck, yucky and yuck.

12. 'Til I Loved You, Barbra Streisand and Don Johnson. Yeah, they were in a relationship and they sang together. Just because you are screwing each other, doesn't mean you have to sing together!!!

13. Friends and Lovers, Gloria Loring and Carl Anderson. What I love about this song is that my co worker's brother played it as the first dance at his wedding. The song is all about cheating! So totally inappropriate for a wedding. Has anyone else been at a wedding when the first dance song was totally inappropriate? Please tell!

Got any others? I am sure there are more...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

There are no horrible Billy Joel songs. There are only horrible people who conclude that if they don't like certain music, then it must be horrible. This is the ultimate state of narcissism.

XUP said...

Don't Go Breakin' My Heart - Elton John and Kiki Dee. Sir Elton alone is usually okay, but I don't know who this Kiki Dee person is and why Elton was forced to do a song with her/him

Anonymous said...

Every Billy Joel song is a horrible song. Shame on you, whoever you are.

Anonymous said...

I love Don't Go Breakin' My Heart!